I rocked you 

I rocked you tonight. Something I haven’t had to do since you were tiny.  You fell into my life and you automatically knew what would break me, so you never peeped. You just closed your eyes when you were tired and drifted off. But tonight I rocked you.  I didn’t count the polkadots in your … [Read more…]

Bigger kids, bigger problems 

I was at a 2nd birthday party, pushing back and fourth my pram while trying to secretly sip a wine in the corner. The birthday girls Aunty came over to me and we made small talk about little Sofia, as her eyes fluttered closed.  “Yes!” I said, a little too excitedly.  “Wait till she’s bigger, … [Read more…]

Redefine sexy 

I can never be a model, I’m too big. I can never be a plus sized model I’m too short. I am told quite often that I should tone up for my husbands sake… cause I’m not “sexy”  I’m not toned, I’m not tall, I’m not smooth, my hair is no longer long and flowing, … [Read more…]

Doulas 

Every woman in her life needs a doula. I am not talking about the one who yells chants at you and aligns your chakras while you push a bowling ball out of your uterus, (however wonderful they are.)  I am talking about the friends that are there in the early days when shit turns to … [Read more…]

A little bit boring 

The door shuts, the husband leaves.   And here we are, alone in the house with two children.    Breakfasts on the floor, dirty nappies, changing of clothes, preparing for whatever day we are going to have all before 8. It won’t be 9 before there’s caffeine involved for me, any later than 9:30 and … [Read more…]

The first days 

Do you ever look back at photos through your phone…? Scrolling through and remembering those times and thinking “awww”… I do with some photos. I get all nostalgic. And with others, I thank the lord that months and years  have passed and when I see that photo, I shudder.  When I was 37 weeks with … [Read more…]